Welcome to Chez Cliff!

Since launching my application, user interaction has become a consistent study of mine.  My thinking is simple: users that have a great interaction with your product tell others.

Too bad Microsoft doesn’t follow that model.

The other day, I was tasked to create a TPS report.  To make it easier for people to read I decided to add a Table of Contents.

Table of Contents (TOC).

My logic thinking brain says “OK, click on Insert and then click on Table of Contents.“  After all, this feature should be buried somewhere in some menu next to the ancient Egyptian Hieroglyphic symbols.

Nope.  Not there.

I consult the help menu.  Searchable it is.  The first result says “How to create a Table of Contents.”  So I click, being the dummy that I am.  Next thing  I know, I’m at Microsoft’s website where a 30 minute video is going to teach me how to create a Table of Contents.

Huh?

Buried 10 or 12 down in the search results is a link that says “How to create a table of contents“.  So I click, being the dummy that I am.  A pop-up window appears that says to insert a Table of Contents follow this trail:

1. Click on Insert
2. Click on Reference
3. Click on Index and Tables
4. On the pop-up window, click on Table of Contents tab located next to the ancient Egyptian Hieroglyphic symbols.
5. Click OK

Wow.  Stupid me.  I guess I’m not smart enough to figure that out on my own.  Duration of my stupid trail:  10 minutes.

The first time I wrote something inside of Pages that required a TOC, my first thought was “Click Insert.  Click Table of Contents“.

I grabbed my mouse and went like this:

1. Clicked Insert
2. Clicked Table of Contents

Done.  Total time:  0.5 seconds.  Yes, I timed it with my stop watch.

Now one could argue “But Cliff, MS Word has all kinds of features that Mac’s don’t have.  It’s not fair!“  True.  But guess which product, MS Word or Pages, has the design philosophy I’d like to have my users experience.

I guess I am cool after all.

Lately, HGTV has been spending more time on my television set.  I must be getting an itch to do another renovation or something.

Anyway, this new show caught my eye:  Income Property.

Income Property is a television show where an experienced real estate investor helps couples turn part of their property into a rental.  Those rentals become the staple to help these new owners make their mortgage payment.

I’ve watched a few of these shows and I’m on the fence.

The mentality of the host is that the owners should not skimp when they do the renovations necessary.  He also knows the proper building codes, so the people don’t get stung if an inspector wanders around.  Of course as usual with HGTV, the finished product rivals any multi-million dollar pentehouse in Manhattan.

What I don’t care for: the show isn’t realistic.

It’s television.  Of course they have to show it having a happy ending.

In a recent episode, the budget was $8,500 to redo the small kitchen, bathroom, all the floors and ceilings.  Fifteen days.  During the bathroom renovation, the wife discovered mold.  Everyone’s worst nightmare.

“All this insulation and wood has to be replaced,” the host stated.  “You can’t have your tenant living in this.”

So they replaced all the wood and the insulation.  An added expense of labor and materials.  How much did the budget go up?  Zero.  Nada.

The husband discovers, much to his chagrin, that someone stole his ATM card thus draining their last $1,200 to finish the renovation.

Host to save the day!  He convinces the contractors to put in some over time in order to save a day of labor costs, thereby finishing the project for $1200 less than they originally quoted.

But wait, there’s more!  Host also convinces the contractors to donate money to help the young couple make their mortgage payment.  $1200.  More good news: the value of the house increased $20,000.  The wife cries with joy.

I don’t know who these contractors are but I would gladly give them all free rent if their generosity could be displayed on any of my projects.  Finishing on time, $1200 under budget, and then giving $1200?

The show’s efforts to help people realize there are other methods of producing income should be applauded.  But the show needs to be more realistic in the problems that people may face.

Flip this House seems to be the more realistic show, regarding the interactions between customers and contractors.

Is it worth watching?  Forget the Hollywood ending.  The education value is still there.  He does discuss the ROI on their project and the best way to extend value of the purchase.  His discussion of tile versus carpet mirrored my own.  For newbies, these types of items can be indispensible.  At least they know terms when speaking with contractors in the future.

I’m always looking for ways to ease the management of my “life”. For these mundane tasks, my thinking involves removing tiny Time Suckers from my schedule so I can focus on more important things.  New things.  Like that bottle of 2002 Chateau Neuf de Pape sitting in my wine fridge . . .

Last year, I put my bills on autopilot and that rocks.

This year has seen the return of mundane tasks.  The other day, the car registration came along.  California has strict emission control and since my car is older, it must be checked every two years.

This is that “two year”.

This is that “pain in the butt two year”.

Even though the test only takes 15 minutes, it’s the 30 minute drive there and back.  It’s the $70 I have to pay.  It’s having to schedule an appointment.  It’s having to hear for the third time “Oh, our machine is broken and we don’t know when it will be fixed.”  Of course they don’t tell you this on the phone.  It’s like they think “Let’s wait ’til Cliff gets here and then tell him we can’t do his car.  It’ll be a hoot!”

To their credit, the Smog Check Factories are all plugged into a state computer system.  Once your car passes, it’s in the state computer and no more paperwork is required on my part.

To their shame, DMV won’t permit me to pay online.  I use to be able to do this.  Since the smog check is in the computer system, the DMV website picks that up.  But that’s not an option this year.  I have to mail a check.  And guess who doesn’t have stamps?

This guy.

Why would I have stamps?  My bills are on autopilot!

What does this mean?  I’m glad you asked.  It’s a trip to the Post Office.  To buy a stamp.  One measly stamp.  I know if I buy a book of them, the new 44 cent stamp will come rolling out then I’ll have to make another trip to buy 2 cent stamps.

Why not go to the DMV?  That’s a great question.  We’re now back to the days where we have to schedule an appointment with the DMV.  That’s right.  You just can’t show up and get new tags.  You have to schedule a “time slot” which is usually 2 hours long.  When can they see me?  Two weeks.

So do I wait two weeks only to wait for another two hours to get the stupid sticker for my license plate?  Or do I mail a check and wait 7 to 10 days for the stupid sticker for my license plate?

Yeah yeah yeah if this is the toughest thing in life, I shouldn’t be complaining.  I should also eat the crust because there’s starving kids in China.

The point of this: it’s amazing how one little thing can completely gunk up the smooth operation of your life.

I’m kind of disgusted with how eBay has evolved.

eBay started off as a simple enough concept: capitalism.  eBay was actually a true test of what market forces happen when they collide on the internet.  Products are placed, people buy what they want, and they spend as much as they want.

But eBay has evolved over the years in what I can only describe as a change from capitalism to socialism.

First it started with eBay deciding they needed to raise revenues.  It’s not that they weren’t making money.  Au contraire!  But they needed to break through that next level and they decided to start charging fees for everything.  If you wanted to list a product, there was a fee.  If you wanted to bold your item’s title, there was a fee.  You want to add a picture?  Fee.

eBay then bought PayPal.  Guess what?  New requirement: if you have less than 1,000 positive reviews then you MUST use PayPal.  Now eBay is dictating the payment method.

Last but not least, eBay also dictates how much you can charge for shipping and handling on many things.  For instance, we had 30+ DVDs to sell.  We found out from the post office that to ship a DVD across the country would be $2.40 and with delivery confirmation ($0.75) and an envelope ($0.25) would come out to $3.40.  So we thought $4 for shipping and handling was fair.

Nope.  Max eBay will allow you to charge is $3.  Period.  No questions asked.

So what about a box set of DVD’s?  You got the Bourne Triology that you want to sell.  Well, eBay classifies it as a (read one) DVD and the max you can charge $3.

So just like the Government raining down new taxes on people, at some point you just have to say “This isn’t worth it” and stop trying.

A guy I know who makes around $40,000 on eBay told me the only way it makes sense is for people to send him a money order.  He tells them there’s a problem with his PayPal and a few days later, a money order arrives in his mailbox.  While it may take a little longer, the extra effort saves him around $5,000 a year.

This blog sucks.

I was 80% of the way to just deleting the whole thing.  But calm reason, and a good bottle of red, calmed me down.  Long into glass number three, I turned my head and looked out the window.  Mr Nichols finished taking a large poop right in front of my patio furniture and then took off running.  I realized something.  

I can’t stop.

I decided perusing my blog entries from a year ago, a year and a half ago would help me.  Golly darn it:  I miss that guy.  I think maybe I had some fanciful notion in my head this blog might be a money machine and decided to gear it towards a “how to” rather than a “Hey, it’s me”.  This is my story and since I’m a story teller, why not tell it?

While I’m getting back to basics, I have to let something slip.  As you know, I’m growing my business which is steadily consuming more and more of my time.  So please don’t panic if you notice from time to time that I miss a post.

That is all.