Welcome to Chez Cliff!

We’ve all heard about debt problems people have.  Common advice to people with multiple credit cards: pay extra on one card until the balance is paid off.  Then use that money to pay off and double up payments on the next credit card.  So on and so forth until all the credit cards are paid off.

What if that same idea was applied to real estate?

An investor I know, along with several partners, buy out of state properties.  Each property produces positive cashflows.  With the cash coming in, what they have elected to do is work on paying off the mortgage of the smallest property.  Once that mortgage is paid off then move onto the next property.  In addition, all the partners chip in an extra $1,000 per month to help the mortgage go away.

With each property being between $75,000 and $200,000 you can see the mortgages on these properties would quickly melt away.

His objective:  have all the properties paid off within five years.  When all is said and done, their monthly cashflow per partner will be $10,000.

I know this flies against Kiyosaki’s cashflow game.  You exit the rat race when the monthly cashflow exceeds monthly expenses.  Pay the minimum on debt, such as mortgages.  It’s better to have cash on hand then to sink every penny into debt and have no cash.  That’s his model.

But what would be wrong in sinking every penny of positive cashflow into paying down a mortgage, especially if you don’t need the money?  In this case, these investors don’t need to have the $500/month in positive cashflow so why not pump it into the mortgage?

I can’t see a downside to this.  Of course I just got here and I know I’m not the smartest person in the room.

I’m hungry and when I’m hungry I talk about food.

Bacon is next to godliness.  

A few months ago I watched as a lady coated her bacon with maple syrup and baked it in the oven, rather than frying it.  Immediately intrigued, I dove into my secret bacon stash and tried it out.  It was absolutely fantastic.  Baking bacon.  Coated in maple syrup.  Highly recommend you stop drinking your coffee and go try this yourself.

**WARNING** – eating maple baked bacon may cause involuntary leg twitches, temporary euphoria, and drool-soaked couch.

The good stuff

A butcher shop around the corner is perhaps one of my favorite stores.  No matter how bizarre my request may be they always accommodate.  When I asked for cow knuckle, they didn’t even flinch with hooking me up with a nice piece.  

Cow knuckle is the home of bone marrow.

Fergus demonstrated this delicious death-row meal on a tv travel show and I was drooling the entire time.  Simply roasted bone marrow spread on toasted baguette with parsley/olive oil accompaniment. No doubt you have tasted this in sauces.  After all animal bones are an integral part of all stocks.  

Hopefully I’ll be able to frequent his establishment in the future.

New foodie video blog

Keep it simple stupid rules my cooking philosophy.  While that may be hard to believe, per my food video, if you pay attention I only use salt and pepper when cooking.  Maybe a third spice.  Cooking is not difficult.

Simple simple simple is how one of my hero chefs, Eric Ripert, cooks on his new site Avec Eric.  Short videos, showing the simplicity and fun of cooking.

If you’ve never heard of Eric, don’t feel bad.  The Food Network is only interested in no-talent assclowns.  Eric has talent so he won’t have his own show.  Please notice when watching his videos he doesn’t say stupid words like “WAM-O” or “E-V-O-O!  That spells moon!”

His videos have made me wonder about purchasing a toaster oven.  Weren’t they called Easy Bake Ovens at one time?  Just to bake a piece of cod for 10 minutes I have to heat up my stove and my kitchen.

Product Placement

This is one of those ideas I should have created.

For those that like to eat while driving . . . .

Word has spread through my friends that I’m an excellent house-sitter.  This holds a lot of appeal because my friends travel.  A lot.  Whether it’s to the Pacific Northwest or across the pond, people are constantly on trips for weeks at a time.  It’s understandable that having someone you trust to look after your home would be appealing.

This last week some friends invited me to house-sit their lovely home, just a few blocks off the ocean.  Wow.  It definitely wins over my tiny house.  Included with this deal was Nano, their puppy.  

Dogs were an integral part of my childhood.  I heart dogs.  And this “house-sit” required taking care of Nano.

After all these years, it had slipped my mind that dogs are smart.  He has this fabric “pen” he is suppose to sleep in at night.  Zippers keep this pen closed.  Next to the box, there’s a note that says the zippers must be secured because he has learned to unzip them.  Which was fine and dandy.

Do you know what else has a zipper?  My suitcase.  Finding my underwear and socks all over the house was an unexpected surprise.  Then trying to get my underoos away from him was mission impossible.  He would rather tear them apart then let me have them.

I remembered dogs are all about short term gains and bribery.  ”What can you do for me now?”  When Nano was happily chewing on my briefs, I rattled his treat box.  Oh look who is my new best friend!  Does Nano want a treat?  Is Nano being a good boy?  Haha!  Sucker!  Look who has his underwear back!

Another thing which I had forgotten: dog express emotions.

Cats have that same, flat expression on their faces 24/7.  Whether they are happy or sad, angry or overjoyed, innocent or demon-possessed cats always look the same.  If they had opposable thumbs they would be the ultimate poker players.       Dogs on the other hand have eyes filled with emotions.  One of those emotions: sadness.

In the morning, Nano is put into the kitchen.  This is his daytime area.  Leaving for the day, I turned to see those big brown eyes starring at me from behind the closed kitchen glass door.  Those eyes that say “Please don’t leave me.”

You know, I had tenants screaming in my face about eviction, claiming I had violated their rights.  Not one iota of guilt.  Nano’s saddened eyes stare at me for two seconds and I’m reduced to a blubbering mess.  Maybe if those former tenants had chewed on my underwear, I would have felt some guilt.

In case you missed it, Ed McMahon from the Tonight Show and Publisher’s Clearing House fame is losing his home.  Anther foreclosure victim.  But not a victim of rising interest rates but rather a failure to make the monthly payments.

Nearly $644,000 in missed payments.

I have a lot of respect for Ed.  Do you know how many times he has personally written me, telling me that I may have won the sweepstakes?  For a man of his stature to take time out to write me is, quite frankly, humbling.

Let me draw your attention to a few phrases in the article which chilled me to the bone.

McMahon, 85, has been a pitchman for the American Family Publishers’ sweepstakes.

However, he has been unable to work as a pitchman for various products since he broke his neck 18 months ago, said his spokesman, Howard Bragman.

Am I to believe that Ed, at the age of 85, is still required to work or else he’ll lose his house?  Whatever happened to retirement?  Does he receive no residual income from the Tonight Show or Star Search reruns?

The thought of having to work at the age of 85 is downright scary.  I know some companies like HP and IBM were phasing out retirement for death separation . . . but good grief!

Of course now we have to ask “Yeah but why does he have a 6 bedroom, 5 bathroom mansion in Beverly Hills?”

Beats me.

Why doesn’t he have it paid off after all these years?

Don’t know.

I understand the danger of focusing on those things you don’t want.  What you focus on is exactly what you receive.  But I can’t help but to shudder at the thought of being 85 and being forced to work.

After nearly 6 weeks of advertising, some interest is finally being shown in the available rental.

At first the rent was increased a little bit to see if the cashflow situation could be improved.  The feedback from those who did respond was that the market is saturated with great rentals.  A common question confronting them was “Do I rent the house with the garage or with the great kitchen?”

Judging by the lack of response, the garage always won.

After a few weeks the rent was dropped to the previous rate.  And once again, the response was lukewarm.

Entering month two: time to get it renting.  Maybe someone could fill the spot after a few more months of searching.  But the mortgage has to get paid.  

So a small cut was made.  Suddenly the phone became flurried with activity.

With any luck, there will be a nibble real soon.